This week Peter and I started a detox—no sugar, no caffeine, no dairy, no gluten…no reason to live. Yesterday was our second day and I genuinely felt like I've had the flu for the last 48 hours. Last night was New Year's Eve and around 9:30 I rolled my sad body into the kitchen to pour us some celebratory glasses of 100% grape juice and then impatiently waited until 10 so that we could ring in fake midnight and fall asleep.
We're doing this because we've started reading Pastor Rick Warren's new book, "The Daniel Plan" and this detox is part of the program. I'll admit that I'm skeptical of a diet book written by a pastor, but on the other hand, I've never read anything of Pastor Warren's that I didn't like. So I'm giving it a chance.
Even before the book was released, I began to realize that I ought to do something like this. While a friend of mine was telling me of her plans to go off sugar after the holidays, I found myself thinking that her plan sounded like madness and that I couldn't imagine going even a week without sugar. A few days later (I'm really pretty slow at processing these things), it occurred to me that the very fact that I couldn't imagine giving up sugar was itself evidence that I needed to.
I don't like this detox. I miss sugar and I really miss caffeine. I napped for 90 minutes yesterday and still couldn't get of the couch after 7 pm. (I also miss dairy, but I apparently don't have a chemical dependency to it. Gluten, it seems is not that hard to give up. Sorry, gluten. Nobody cares.) I don't like this detox, but I'm going through with it anyway. And Peter's going through with it, too, so at least we'e miserable together.