Sunday, July 20, 2014

Closet Purge

My favorite clothes . . none of which I could fit into if my life depended on it.
I am in the middle of one of the most wonderful, empowering, painful, and exciting projects I've ever undertaken. What? A baby. No, no, no. This is far more challenging than bringing a human life into the world…and in many ways more rewarding. I'm in the middle of a closet purge.

I recently discovered the idea of a capsule wardrobe on Pinterest. The term, I am told, refers to a collection of essential pieces of clothing and accessories that can be interchangeably combined to create a wardrobe that is more than the sum of its parts and can be stretched to create the illusion of variety even when the same clothes are being worn day after day. I'm sure all you Vogue-reading, Project Runway-watching ladies already knew of this idea but it was news to me. Good news. Welcome news. 

Ive been living with a full closet and several storage tubs of clothes and still nothing to wear. I've got the clothes I wore when I was overweight, the clothes I wore after I got down to a size six, the clothes I wore when I was pregnant, and the clothes I wore in between my pregnancies. Nothing fits quite right. Nothing works together. But building a wardrobe from scratch for my new childbearing body is a daunting and expensive task. The idea of a minimalist wardrobe allows me to use a recipe written by an expert in the field, which I am not.

The problem is…I'm a hoarder, and the first step to creating a new minimalist wardrobe is getting rid of the old junky one. 

Letting go of these clothes requires me to let go of the past. Remember that time I wore size four satin  pants? I do. It feels like it was only yesterday, but in reality, it was five years ago—the month before I got pregnant with my sweet daughter Lydia.

This is painful!

I have to admit to myself that I will never be that size again. If if I lost all the weight between sizes 12 and 4 (doubtful) my body is a different shape. My tummy is softer and my hips are wider.

Four trash bags worth of learning to let go.
And I'm also keenly frugal. I look at these bags of clothes and think of the money I spent on them. It breaks my heart to give them up. But these clothes are doing me no good taking up space in my closet, taunting me every morning when I have to sort through them to find something—anything—to cover my body for the day.

And really, that's all I've been doing for the last couple years. Really, since my first child was born, I've just been spending the bare minimum to keep myself dressed with no plan or forethought given. I've bought shirts and pants that met the essential requirement of covering my belly and my bottom. Now is my chance to start over. I don't plan on spending much, but I do plan on planning. I'll buy clothes that fit my actual, current size. I'll chose colors and designs that will work with each other. I will look for more just a clearanced price. I'll purchase and dress intentionally and (I hope) joyfully. 

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